When I walked back into the room, things were not going well. The blame game started immediately. Neither girl seemed to be at fault judging by her own story, but both of them were at fault based on each other’s stories. I had been praying for this opportunity. I knew the time had come to speak hope and peace into this chaotic world of suffering relationships.
After doing my best to understand the situation at hand, I expounded on the principle of heaping coals of fire on your blessed enemies head. This concept could surely change their world. They patiently listened to me, allowing me to share what I thought needed to be shared. But my amazing Jesus-theory didn’t seem to be lighting up their world. As soon as I was finished, they started intensely discussing boys and friendships and things that had nothing to do with heaping coals of fire on anyone’s head.
I knew I had lost them but was sure God’s way could bring peace to their chaos. I desperately wanted them to know and understand the truth of God’s gentle love. I remembered what a mentor once told me, “If you can’t get in the front door, you can always try the back door. There are windows and attics as well.”
As they busily discussed the details of their lives, I searched for the key to unlock the back door. After grabbing their attention again, I started over. “Imagine a world full of kind people. It only has kind people. There is kindness everywhere. How would that make you feel?”
They looked at me for a few long seconds. I waited expectantly, thinking they surely might buy into this one.
”I would not like that… I would think it’s fake.”
”I wouldn’t be in that world. I’m mean.”
”I would not want that.”
None of them were interested in a world full of kind people. It meant nothing to them. And I realized that choosing kindness wasn’t even on their radar. So much for heaping coals of fire on each other’s heads.
I’m just confused because surely they want kindness, deep in their hearts somewhere.
I dare to ask them if they think I’m kind. They tell me that I am. I ask them if they don’t think my kindness is fake. They have to stop and think.
“Girls club and Bible school are the only places where there are kind people.”
”No, you’re definitely kind.”
I ask them how they know that my kindness is not fake. They stop to think again.
“Well, you’re just a good person.”
“I never thought of that before!” And her face lights up a little.
”Welll…sometimes I wonder if it actually is real.”
Now how in the world have we gotten here? Where am I going with this and just exactly how does the Gospel work anyway? If they believe my kindness is real then there’s a glimmer of hope, but it’s going to take the grace of God to go live this out in their world.
As of now, my simple offering of love isn’t turning anyone into an angel. It’s only giving them a tiny glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, there’s something more in life after all.
How can I bring the presence of Jesus into this mess? If I remember right, that’s why I stepped into this in the first place. But I’m learning a few things.
What is the love of Jesus anyway and do I understand it myself? Why do I believe in love and what actually is love, anyway? How can I explain this concept to girls who so desperately need it?
I am starting to see that we don’t love unless we have first been loved. We don’t believe it exists until someone shows us what love means and proves that we are lovely even in our mess. I thought I could explain this to them, but I realize now that they only need to see it lived out.
Am I willing to be a living sacrifice so they can believe that Someone greater than they was willing to lay down His whole life for them? Knowing we are deeply loved changes our world.
“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.” Romans 12:1
And I realize now that it’s only because someone chose to sacrificially love me and bring the presence of Jesus into my chaos that I even know the heart of God at all.
colliding with destiny 